rose blood lover's tears

Sad Theatre

2010-01-23T06:31:00.000-08:00

Errr...

Do you guys like have this habit of talking to yourself? I do

Its how I simulate each event...say...like a presentation or a conversation or confrontation.

I think recently mine has gone too far...I started to create my own characters. Then I housed them in this world i created. All inside my mind. Freaky huh?

The character is none other then my own different version. Each version has this 'opinion' about stuf that happen in reality.

Example...

Let say there's this item I wanted to buy and it cost like crazy expensive. So, my 'Fanism' would persuade me to buy it even though I might suffer financially later on.

My 'Berjimat' self would force me NOT to buy because its ridiculous.

So the pressure is this...Its a LIMITED EDITION PIG RABBIT!!! only one left

So i consult my 'Logic & Common sense' to have a meeting with both 'Fanism' and 'Berjimat'

The conclusion i get is this (after and intervention from my 'Angel' side):

It's already Asar and I better pray first to calm me down. Later we went back to the shop. If its still there then it must be fate. So I arrange an agreement with the shop owner to let me book it first. If she allow, I pay half now, and half after I got my latest paycheck on certain date.

I she agrees, then the item is fated to belong to me
If not, then It wasn't meant to be...

All has their part in discussion.

That's is my mind theater.

* What make's it sad is that I accidentally created my version of ultimate female companion. Now I obligate to find her. It's not much though but my peculiar likings makes it harder...

So there.

Creating Words

2010-01-23T06:21:00.000-08:00

It's tiring composing a melodic sentence! Here's the scoop...

We were assigned to do a lyric for our project. It will be used in our so called OST. So for the sake of 'berjimat' we make the lyric our selves. So we went back and wrote like 2 versions.

We went back the next week and show it to the professional and...there's a lot of faults. Well, its our first try. So she ask us to choose either to fit for the song as well. So we went back again.

That night I demoed to Dhud of the 2 different lyric and how it will fit on 2 different song type. We actually liked them both. So...again...we fix the lyrics and send them both to the professional and request to make 2 songs instead of one; A fast rock and a rock ballad. She agreed.

So next week we meet to finalize everything and seal the deal. Hope to get the first gimps how the song would sound like...

So now the music biz is done, back to the animation. He have like 1 week to finish the modeling before the coming of February, that's the animating month.

Pray that the finance release next week, we're dead broke (if we were to continue this broke, we might actually be...dead) Please....

So there...check out our new Website with micro site next month!

돼지 토끼 :p

2010-01-23T06:00:00.000-08:00

Heartbeat! beat, beat, beat....

Sorry guys, today its not about 2PM (I would like to though) but something else...

This week I think I faint and go to K-Heaven. I don't know if you know that I adored this K-Drama called 'Mi-nam-i-si-ne-yo'. Its a story about this fictional band and their secret 2nd main vocal.

Well that is not totally the point. Being a fan myself. I ordered several collectibles from the drama. Here's the list:

This is the one I bough from a shop in KL. Actually placed an order from there
1-Go Minam Phone strap
2-ANjell Phone strap
3-PSH Phone strap

This one I ordered online thru my bro using his CC (he he he). Got it last week. yay!
5-Pig rabbit doll mid size ver. (can record voice)

Not only that, I've also order the 'Hairpin' from the same shop and it has arrived last Friday! Along with other stuff...Can't wait to combine them Ala in the drama.

I know, i know...next time I post pictures of it after I got all stuff with me.

고 - 혜

2009-12-15T01:58:00.000-08:00

Again the 'Feelings' ! ...bla bla...

***************************

I've accidentally stumble into another K-D jewel and (to shut those 'im the above' dude) I've obtained the 720p version with each 1.5 G's the least. And my friend said that im wasting my space.

Well, im different. Cause most of what i like is too limited and may come once in 2 year. That when CP debut on 2007 and YB late this year. So, yeah...my space is going no where.

***************************

Self-dissection. Im a bit of all 3 angels. Sometimes cold, chirpy and simply annoying. Similar to the traits of CP manager. Hmmm... too many similarities

So, if this going somewhere, im waiting for my 고 - 혜 sooner. I think i've met her somehwere...du du du

***************************

Good...(maybe not) pu pu pu...news! 미남이시네요 is going to relase DVD Director's cut soon, mebi next year. Can't wait. Heard that the DVD got 2 extra episode and will spend more time with Jeremy and Shin Woo. (Gotta listen to 'Without Words)

***************************

Im looking for ribbon hair pin with diamond-like decorations. if you guys stumble one, tell me. Later i need to find the owner...(she may have short hair)

**************************

Still in dreamland...i need to go. t

To Shabs, TM is too much...just T
To that guy on the radio ...im NOT doing your way, sorry...
I think im finished with CP but YB drag me back to this kind of world. If it meant to be...so be it, but if your presents just torment me again and again...ottoke...

**************************

If So ...

I look at you, and you look the other way,
Still your hand held mine, won't letting go,
You silence me when i need to say,
'I love you' but you held my heart even more,

If so just let go,
If so then release me,
Or love me as you would,
Or just let me be

You made me cry thousands time,
Yet you comfort me million time more,
Does it hurt just to love me once,
Is it too much for you.

If so unchain me,
If so let me fly away,
Or open your eyes and see,
That I can love you, if you may.

As you walking in front of me,
I tried to be by your side,
Yet you become so distant, i can't reach you.

If so just let go,
If so then release me,
Or love me as you would,
Or just let me be

p/s-Haven't write poetry since STJ (sorry)

*****************************

CUT!!!

2009-10-10T02:18:00.000-07:00

Rimas to da max!

I have this problem...I'm 'snipping' happy...

Which means that I always find freaky reasons to cut my hair.

I always wanted those crazy long locks like that dude from 'RIM Chart Show' way back in asrama days where long hair is forbidden (even though I manage to sneak in 'amoi-bop' once a while).

But every time my hair grow few inches, I start to tremble...pui pui pui...the next thing I knew, I don a 'Miyavism' which I declare not to because it's a pain in the neck to grow back the hair on the sides.

Now I manage to stand still and resist cutting. Then I watched SBS Idol Show Chuseok Special...Lot's of new cuts! I mean A LOT OF NEW HAIR cuts!!!!!

No I have these dilemma. Go Tae Young or Jo Kwon. Short and rimasless.

fyi...I never went to a salon in my life. Its either my mom or myself who cut it. One time I got caught having long hair in my asrama days and sent to some freakin pakcik to get cut. I nearly cried my pantsy ass out until I managed to 'talk' to the pocik to give me the 'amoi-bop'. Which he did!

*************************************

소녀시대 still 'hasut' me into buying Chocolate...too girly.

*************************************

Watched 'Papadom' by Afdlin Shauki last few days with my friends and their friend. This makes it a fourth Malay movie I watched in my lifetime. Most for research.

It's a funny movie. Laughing all the way even when it's finished. But that was all there is...only a funny movie. The movie has few 'sad scene' but non manage to jerk my of my tears. Still waiting those Malay movie that can water me eyes.

* i watched a K movie and there's a scene where the mother looked at her daughter. That scene enogh to make me drop a few tears, which I find it weird. The mother hasn't begun crying yet. Maybe because me think me feel how the mother felt of her freaky daughter.

* another sad movie is a Chinese movie which I forgot the title but its about a really2 young school teacher. Wait...I think its called 'Not One Less'.

*************************************

Has anyone heard Abracadabra by Brown Eyed Girls? The MV has this sexy 'hip sway' dance that Jo Kwon so obsessed about. I think Ga-in is mesmerizing...susu jagung?

*************************************

Last Thursday got this bet with my 'self-proclaimed-Hyde fanatics and specialist' friend. I got this song and change all the data in it so he cannot know the name of the singer.

I let him listen for a while and make the bet...is he Hyde the singer or not.

He firmly state that it is not Hyde, because he know Hyde's voice well.

pui pui pui

On monday I will bring the PV of the song. Let see who will be burn!

*************************************

I know I promised to post my vacation with pics galore but all the pics is in my mom's Laptop. I post it as soon as I get the pics (not much though)

*************************************

Back to the hair situation. Should I cut or not and which style should I pursue. Leave comments in my shout box

* A-moi bop - Those round cuts and the back with shave necks. Nowadays its all a shroom cuts. Only 2 dude manage to wear it long enough in asrama. Me and my friend, Karate-boh. (short for karate bohjan cause our warden suspecting him flirting outside the school fence)

Im back!

2009-09-26T10:47:00.000-07:00

Penat sih!

Just got back from Sepang...and from SABAH! What a weird vacation, and the most testosteroniously challenging week! But me tell you in detail in my next post...if I not lazy.

***

Faiz msg me that Dhud is lonely. Lonely?

***

I dunno what else to talk about. I intend to write about 'identity stealer' but may cause damages. So I postponed that as well.

***

Checking my emails. Suddenly a lot of my ol' high schools friend add me in their 'Facebook'. Baru skang mau add? Most of them got married or pregnant or already become a mom, so...what the use

***

Fun Raya with merits! All my aunts, great aunts, grandma from Johor to Sabah ask 3 usual questions;

Dah abis blaja? (Yes ma'am, graduated last month)
Dah kerja? (Sudah, gov grant for a year - dengan kerek kasi anak buat duit raya, tanda dah kerja)
Dah kahwin/ ada awek or cewek by clan Sabah? (errrrrrrrrrrrrr..........blum)

Soalan 1 dan 2 dapat tepis. Soalan 3 memang 'maut' habis! But wait!

After 3 grueling questioning session, came the most annoying yet hopeful sentence...

"Nanti makcik kenal kan ngan sorang kenalan....anak si.....kawan anak si...bla bla bla"

***

Last one...there's a lot of 'potential' chikas in LCCT. Some gorgeous, some cute, some jaded, some from difference race; but one really caught my eye... and she's wearing 'tudung labuh'! she reminds me of ol college mate (different course). Both of em' looked exactly like Megan Follows. Megan who? Bukan Megan Fox ye...tapi Megan Follows. Same flight from Sabah.

Ih ih ih...merapu kerapu

***

To my friends, posses, enemies, other self and...NIOPPers. SELAMAT HARI RAYA!

0-0 untill next raya!

Silence!

2009-08-25T00:16:00.000-07:00

What a way to kick of puasa...

I though it was my routine tonsillitis (that would last a day oso), but it ain't go away. Went to %^&%^& clinic and they gave me antibiotics and a bunch of suckers that he said would numb my 2 annoying throat pillows. Pretty standard.

Day 2 has passed and my tonsillitis still there. To make the matter worst, I got multiple canker sore!

So now I pretty much a mute dude.

All those delish 'buka puasa' food my mom made last weekend and all i can do is such porridge.

Sedih...

*selamat berpuasa, Exia Ignition or Roll Out ver.?

PlayList Intrusion

2009-08-04T05:22:00.000-07:00

TAGGED BY: J-man

RULES:

Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.
Have Fun!

IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
Waltz Sofa - Humming Urban Stereo

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
My First Love (string ver.) - Takako Uehara

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
HOWLING - Abingdon Boys School

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Goodbye - The Melody

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
너는 (You)- LoveHolic

WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
날씨 맑음 (미스티 블루 cover song) - Taru

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
The Little Drummer Boy - Misty Blue

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Perfect World- Arco

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Musou Uta - Suara

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
신기루 - LoveHolic

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Aimless - Juka

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Lounge People - Humming Urban Stereo

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Juliet - Izabel Verosa

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Bless You - LoveHolic

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Go Go Chan!! (고고찬!!) (Feat. 요조) - 티어라이너 (Tearliner)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
In My Dreams - Autumn In My Heart OST

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Waltz - Suneohair

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
火の鳥 (Hi no Tori) - Mika Nakashima

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
For a While -Mni

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
FAKE - Mika Nakashima

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
하루 하루 (haru-haru, day by day) - Big Bang

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Kiss - Nana Kitade

Grossed Out!

2009-07-19T07:26:00.000-07:00

I had to post this!

I've eaten rotten mango!

How?

I was too lazy to slice the fruit. I 'peel' the mango in stead.
Who knew there's a $%^%$^ in side!

Frapps for Moi' ... please!

2009-07-11T07:41:00.000-07:00

As I listen to YEH's Salad Song, I then realized something... I've been listening to the same song for 2 straight days now. Why?

It all began when I started idling in the rented house. Got nothing else to do... So I opened J-man's shared folder. There's a lot of things to watch...

Winter Sonata? done
Hana Kimi? finished already
Movies? Too much commitment

The there's this lingering folder under WS. It was Coffee Prince, or Keoupi Purinsu. What the heck. Might as well watch it (since I didn't finished watching it on NTV7 last year).

After midway episode, I notice something very disturbing, to me at least.

The character Han Gyeol has uncanny similarity with me;

Both reaching 30th soon
Both live alone in personal house
Both matriarch (in my case, my mom) pushing for marriage
Both driving small car (mine rather the cheaper version)
Both has no intention to get married
Both has distant lovers taken by somebody close
Both as the tendency to childishly tease girls

Funny how things related. There are one more similarities that I can't tell yet, but you can sniff it out as these blog rolls.

...OK, back to CP ramblings...

So I watched the episodes continuously, or what my mates call...a marathon. Then, my heart ache for no reason. As the episodes reaching its end, I started realizing something.

I'm in LOVE!

...gosh, the music changed again...me rant later...

* guess who's I'm in love with, ha!

In Love?

2009-04-02T19:29:00.000-07:00

How shall I put it?

It's been years I've neglected this basic human feeling.

Why?

Ever since college, I dare not to venture that unpleasant ground anymore. Since my life turned up-side down, I cannot afford any @##$ broken. So I make my way as it is...blindfully void.

Why Now?

Well, things going great this time. I finally graduate, got a perfect job (which will commence soon) and I got a house, prematurely. Still, that void lingers...

So?

So, in the end...i went home, all dark and stuffy, sat on my couch, looking at my side...'Eh, mana orang kiri kanan nih?'

Is it loneliness?

OK! goddammit! I admit I was feeling a bit lonely. Is it natural? when you finally thought You've settle down, but you actually making things more invisible?

God made human with pairs you know...

I know, I know...But these things cannot be forced ...

So?

So, gimme a few days, see if this temporary sickness is...well...temporary

i HATE tag

2009-03-05T00:10:00.000-08:00

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are not looking merely for a girl/boyfriend - you are looking for your life partner. Perhaps you should be more open-minded about who you spend time with. The person you are looking for might hide their charm under their exterior.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

My First Tag

2009-02-22T08:11:00.000-08:00

*Nyaaa~*

My first tag from Jijy. Well, here we go!

It's something from Gundam OO, I really forgot the name...gomen ne g-kun!

Etc's?

2009-02-14T06:37:00.000-08:00

"... cause life is full of bullshit...", said Tsugumi

Words paint here

2009-02-14T06:35:00.000-08:00

... original stories straight out off my vault ...

Book Review

2009-02-12T20:04:00.002-08:00

... got a lot of books to share with you guys ...

Movie Review

2009-02-12T20:04:00.001-08:00

... i shouldn't watch that but ...

Music Review

2009-02-12T19:50:00.001-08:00

... my sweet songs will make your ears bleed ...

Hajime?

2009-02-12T18:28:00.000-08:00

... talk a bout for the first time ...